reflections in a mirror

I see a world full of illusions.  Gazing into the mirror, a subtle deceptiveness of confidence is revealed through the weakness, insecurity in my longing eyes.  Truth revealed through uncertainty.. smiles and genuinity fade away to darkness and tears…confusion.   Yet, it knows the inner most depths of how small.. fragile and broken i am.  How solemn..and alone I must walk, easily deterred with lost facades of hope.  I yearn,  grasping for joys of days past.  Once so proud in the heavens, glorious morning skies gone with tomorrow distant, birds chirp endearingly to fragrant dews of days forgotten. Frosty breezes and velvet skies are felt.. with outstretched arms i call and wait for the compassionate embrace of life, yet they fall heavy and barren.  Holding dearly to every ounce of light in the passing sky, every ray i treasure with new hopes, every breeze felt, every golden glimmer warmth to a tired soul.  I inhale deeply remembering the echoes heard only in my heart, played again and again in tempered bliss.   The sounds of laughter now gone..  i wonder why?  So many horizons in the past.. so many wonders swept away in the tide, crashing and taken from my life, to be seen only in distant dreams.  My reflection cries desperately.  Mocked in contempt for even trying.   Every false move and clumsy act is noticed..questioned critically i try to answer in vain hopes. . 

The essence of living and the worth of life. .

yet. . .  

Grace for yesterday and perserverance for tomorrow.

but still i wonder why.