Open for the world to see…

My eyes in America are closed.  I find myself often wondering what is going on there?  The news, politics, current affairs.. I am clueless to the latest events and it is sometimes scary.  But more importantly, I really wonder how life is back in the states for my close friends and family.  Everyone always tells me positive things… nothing negative.  This is the ultimate paradox and it really makes me worry.

Writing in a website is not easy.  Pouring out your heart and soul..thoughts and emotions online for all to read about feels unnatural…  Nevertheless..i feel that someone out there will be able to see my struggle and live and learn from the things I have encountered.  All of the heartache and loss..seeing new sights and meeting new people.  Maintaining integrity and strength amidst such blatant corruption is not easy.  Maybe someone will truly understand something from my words..wisdom gained from an insightful mind.  However, there is so much more i would like to write..so much more i would like to share and open up…but i haven’t the courage to do so.

i want to pour out my heart, to truly express my every desire and urge, worry and fear.  I have so many things going on in my life here daily, and even in America that i can swim in a pool of my own doubts and worries if i allowed myself such liberty.

I just wish there was a way to know.  If i could truly know what is in the hearts of people my life would be easier.